Doubting Thomas

doubt

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9)

So there was this guy called Thomas, he was one of the followers of Jesus who has been widely talked about and criticised in many bible study discussions because of his lack of faith and him not trusting the fact that Jesus had died and rose again until he could prove it physically (John 20:24-29).

At some point, his story got me thinking and I began to tell God, that I didn’t see anything wrong in what Thomas did and as a matter of fact, if I’m being honest, I would do the exact same thing, because I mean you can’t tell me that someone I saw killed with my eyes is alive after three days without concrete proof.

Nevertheless, what got to me was the fact that when Jesus came to the disciples again and didn’t tell Thomas off or criticized him but instead He allowed him to see for himself that it was true after which he added that blessed are those who believe without seeing. The point is Jesus came down to Thomas’ level to reveal himself to him in order for Thomas to believe after which He told him the way forward with God (Believing without seeing).

I believe that’s how God gets through to us, when we are very open and honest with him acknowledging we are weak. Thomas didn’t pretend to have the faith the other disciples exhibited and so should we when in a similar situation. Sometimes when I’m trying to believe God for something and I am in so much doubt I tell him God I’m finding it hard to believe you will do this but I want to, so please help my unbelief. After all it’s by his Grace we believe in HIM; so let’s not fake it but instead be real with him because God’s strength is made perfect in our weaknesses (2 Corinthians 12:9) and with his help we will grow into his perfect will for us.

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He still loves me!

God's LoveHi, my dearest readers 🙂 first of all I apologise for the late post this week esp. for those who keep up. It has been one heck of a week I tell you and not exactly in the best of ways… so much have gone on, some of which I am still trying to make out what I’m supposed to learn or benefit from it because I’m all about everything working together for my good you know (Romans 8:28). When I do find out, and learn and understand, I promise to share when the time is right ;).

Although one thing got me through this week and it was a scripture God has been banging in my heart that “we love him because He first loved us” (I John 4:19). I was thinking emm I kind of know you love us God so what am I supposed to get from this? Truth is I really didn’t know how much God loved me.

Because I have had my doubts, asking questions such as- does God love me ALL the time??? At the points when I do really bad and mean things or wrong Him does he stop loving me??? The answer is He loved and still does love me even at my filthiest and this is same for everyone. You see my friends, God does not ever stop loving us- sinful or perfect because from the very beginning he loved us. What God wants is NOT for us to hide away from him thinking He’s one angry God, out there to get us anytime we fall short but He’s as loving as can be and ready to embrace us the minute we turn to him. So let’s approach his throne of grace boldly and continuously with sincere hearts and he will lovingly receive us EVERY TIME. So the times during the week that I fell short, I asked for mercy and tell myself He still Loves me whether I feel it or not… 🙂

[However, this is not an invitation to deliberately sin as God is not mocked, whatever you sow you reap 😉]

Do I Qualify?

qualify

Accepted the way I am.

You see I grew up in a society where the definition of Christians are those who have it all together, who are spotless and without blemish (lol), who do the right things at the right time who are ‘holy’ all the time, etc. To be honest I found out I was not happy with myself. I’m thinking now why would God answer my prayers when I keep falling short, why would God use me for anything at all or bless me when I barely reach the standards being set. I don’t even qualify for any of his promises because if you look through the bible most of his promises are for the righteous and bottom line is, I don’t think I qualify to be called righteous. I believed this for so Long until God opened my eyes to the real truth.

I got it all wrong and twisted, he didn’t want me to try clean myself up, he wanted me to come to him as filthy and dirty as I was and he’ll do only what he alone does best. He  proved it to me through different scenarios in the bible, how he came not for those who know their way and think they have it all together, but for the Lost, those who have messed up, big time. For example, Matthew 5:3 (NLT) says blessed are those who are poor and realise their need for him, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven. Romans 4 was what really opened my eyes.  What struck me was vs 14 of that chapter that “if God’s promise was for only those who obey the law, then Faith is not necessary and the promise is pointless” and BOOM! That was it for me. That I am counted as righteous (vs12) because of my Faith in him and nothing else… Yes nothing else! So I qualify!