Knowing Myself

When you go through the waters, I will be with you

When you go through the waters, I will be with you

I have been thinking about this topic a lot lately. We are in a world where we are constantly figuring out who we really are, either as individuals, as a brother, a sister, a mother, a father, a wife, a husband, a friend or even as a unit.

With consistently changing circumstances, we are forced to redefine our priorities, our likes and dislikes, and how to respond to these circumstances in a way we believe will yield the best possible outcomes not just for ourselves but also for the world we live in.

To be honest it can be hard sometimes; because the thing with constantly evolving is that we may find ourselves trying to play catch up while at the same time trying to grasp on to the very things we tie our identities to.

I for one have had to go through heavy transition phases within the past year and it required a lot of adjusting, re-prioritizing, and adapting to leading life in a different way; and in the heat of it all, I became worried that I was now only going through the motions but at the same time, missing a vital part of the equation… myself.

As a result, I realised quickly the importance of re-evaluating my deepest values, desires and goals in life- the things in general that make me- me; so that I don’t loose sight of what they are and what they mean to me.

Someone told me recently that as I grow older, I am entrusted with more responsibilities especially as a result of the roles I take on as life progresses. So the question is how do I juggle it all and at the same time consistently remain true to myself.

To be honest? I’m still figuring it out.

I will however leave you with a few pointers that has been helping me so far. I’ve had to learn to purposefully relax and trust that with time, things will fall into place.

As a Christian I believe it when the bible says that – “All things will work together for the good of those that Love God and are called according to his purpose”. I also bank on the verse where God promises us that “He will never leave us nor forsake us”. So I have to trust that a lot of the times when I have not got myself altogether, God has got me.

I could sit here and give keys and pointers concerning how to be true to yourself and know yourself but I really can’t because everyone’s journey is unique.  We have to all remember that as human beings we are dynamic and are constantly being affected and changed either subtly or significantly by the environments we live in, the events that happen in and around our lives, and time.

I am beginning to understand that God is and needs to be at the centre of my life. His love for me especially through his son Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, gives me the peace and assurance that I don’t have to figure this thing called life on my own; because He is always with me. So I urge you all today to dare to make him the priority in your life and you may well be on your way to figuring out who your creator has made you to be.

 

Love and Blessings…

Maintaining Your Individuality

Lit light bulb amongs unlit incandescent bulbsSo I was at church the other day with a friend and at the time I was still fairly new to this church environment and my friend was even more of a newbie to the church than I was. I usually am very quiet, reserved and a bit withdrawn when I’m in a situation or an environment I consider foreign or new so I’m not exactly my real self. I guess it’s my way of gradually getting to know my new environment and understanding how to fit in.

However this friend of mine whom I was still getting to know at the time didn’t really seem to care if she was new; she was her loud, jolly self like she had known all these people longer than she really had. I was surprised if I’m being honest at how confident she was, not really minding how people would perceive her. She was not rude or anything she was just being herself. Now I liked it… I even secretly envied her confidence. I thought to myself now here is someone who knows and maintains her individuality.

Then I got to thinking about how sometimes I fail to stay true to myself probably because I think it’s not in the social order at the time to do so; or because I’m adhering to some sort of unspoken rule that governs the social setting. Now I’m not saying act crazy, misbehave or anything of that sort. The information I’m trying to relay is; how many of us truly show up enough to be truly known.

I feel like if God wanted us to all be the same, he would not go through the trouble of locating us in different continents, with different colours of skin and with different traditions and values. I believe God wants us to understands the beauty in diversity and hence get yet another revelation of how infinite He is. As Christians a lot of us tend to conform to this ideal we have in our heads as what a good Christian looks like and how they should act especially when in church; which is good when walking in accordance with the bible but we tend to forget that God made us individually unique for a reason and purpose higher than us. Sometimes we worry too much about how we are perceived by the world in general and as a result rob the world the opportunity to catch a glimpse of how beautiful and ingenious our creator really is.

Now nobody is perfect and I as well as everyone have flaws but this shouldn’t hinder us from showing up in what I’d call our full glory. God had to teach me to be proud of whom He has and is still making me to be. To find my identity in him and not in the way people perceive me to be. To not try and be anyone else but to be me; because that way He gets us show us off as the fragrance of Christ; in other words- His beautiful work of art!
Love and blessings

I found myself

light-at-end-of-pipe

Weeping may endure for the night but Joy comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5)

I felt empty, rejected, and alone and it made me question who I am. I remember saying to myself- no this doesn’t happen to me. You see I hear of other people’s roller coaster situations and I’m quick to give as much encouragement as I can to help them get through their situation.

Now it was time for me to actually encourage myself but I couldn’t find any words and all I remember was telling God to heal my heart. I kept repeating it so much that I didn’t really realise the magnitude of what I was asking God to do me.

I didn’t realise that telling God to heal my heart was not just asking him to make the pain go away but allowing him bring to light the darkness in my life, exposing insecurities I was not sure I was ready to expose, showing me certain parts of me that I didn’t even know was there and now I still think to myself and say wow!

You see if there’s one thing I’ve learnt about asking to have a personal encounter with God, be it based on healing or something else is that God doesn’t deal with the superficial.

God is such a deep being that he deals with roots, deep roots. Be careful when you ask God to get involved with something in your life because He’s going to go all in. But you know what? He’s going to give you the courage and strength you need to face whatever needs facing.

So when I said God heal my heart, He did and I found myself.

Now I thought I knew myself but everything I knew was on a superficial level. God showed me who he has made me to be on a deeper level and the phrase “fearfully and wonderfully made” began to make more sense.

That phrase is not even about some sort of outer or even inner beauty; it was way more than that. It was more about an intricately made being with a massive potential for greatness, it was about the power God has placed on the inside that needed to be tapped into and about how we are such a designer’s original and not a counterfeit of someone else.

So I found myself and I want to encourage you today that when it seems God is silent just remember he is working on the roots; so don’t stop hoping and praying because who knows what you’ll find.

Dear Self,

First of all I want you to remember that you are unique and only God has the power to make you and not anyone else.

Remember to not settle because people say to settle but because God says to.

I want you to know that people will come and go but God will never ever leave you nor forsake you and NOTHING can separate you from the Love God has for you (Romans 8:38-39; 31:6).

To also know that even when things are not going good and when it doesn’t feel like it, God is still with you even in the midst of the storm (not just the big ones, even your little every-day struggles).

Be patient; there’s time for everything and God has made everything beautiful in its time (Eccl 3:11).

The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill but time and chance happens to them all. (Eccl 9:11)

But remember God is the author of time.

I want you to keep reminding yourself that God has not given you the spirit of fear but a spirit of power of love and of a sound mind until you truly believe it. (2 Timothy 1:7)

Consistently learn to love yourself; the bible says to love your neighbour as yourself – you can’t give what you don’t have.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:14)

Remember to be gracious to others as God shows you grace.

Finally I want you to know I love you, but I also want you to continuously open your heart and receive God’s love for you because-

Only He loves best…

Sincerely Yours truly.